Katana Thoughts: My Christmas

My Christmas Day w/ His Lovely Family

it was truly a nerve wrecking day..well at least the day before Christmas Day… I met my boyfriend’s family on his mother’s side, but I didn’t get to meet her. They were truly so welcoming, kind, and smart. At the table we spoke bout health, education, law… I love it. They are a cute family. Their house was so traditional and beautiful like I mean look at this room! This is their family room. I wanted to sit there and stare at this forever.

I never get to experience something like this. My anxieties was only because I was scared that I was too awkward and not as smart as them but we connected. I did though, fought fatigue and the migraines from forcing myself to be as energetic and to talk more. I got so many brain fogs. So staring at this tree was perfect lol..

I didn’t get to take picture of the food but it wouldn’t be right anyways. It was amazing. Ham, Turkey, Sweet Potatoes, Cranberry, Brussel Sprouts, Garlic bread… they had all my faves. I didn’t eat much of turkey though as smoked ham is rare to have and is sexyyyy.

We stayed until the evening, and it was just amazing. I wished I could stay longer and talked to Tita Julie, one of his aunts. She is so cute, so funny, and talkative. She made me feel so comfortable. Her presence broke the ice or awkwardness that was there.

I hope to learn more Tagalog to speak more with formality with my boyfriend’s family and also understand when they broke into their language lol

The night was interesting, my mom came at 1am to drop off gifts which I forgot to get a photo of but it involves sparkling wine, a hottle, cards with $200 lol which was weird.. my boyfriend didn’t know how to accept as he didn’t know her well. I knew this was her way of thanks for taking care of me. I hope one day us three can spend time together but I’m not sure how they’d connect yet. It’s kind of my fault as I’ve told him of things that she did to make me depressed and such but I believe…that she sort of changed.

~~~~~

Day 2 (aka Boxing Monday)

 

We bought home appliances and then went to a Sushi Restaurant, and it was lovely. I had an anxiety attack earlier.. felt still exhausted. I felt bad though, I snapped at him in the morning because I didn’t want to and didn’t like going somewhere far and crowded again but I got myself up and pushed because if anything goes wrong… he is there. I am SAFE…. and I was. We took a break when the crowd was too much. Sad against the wall and he sat aside me holding my hand. He was concerned and though he hates being cooped up at him, he knew I wasn’t doing well; so we got a ride home right after.

Home really is my safely spot. Comfort zone. I know it’s not good to be cooped up. and I don’t plan to. I just needed a moment of privacy. I think that’s what is a good exercise and perhaps part of exposure therapy. After setting up the new cups and dish rack, I felt better. And we went out again but somewhere close by, so we don’t push it too much.

This sushi place brought a smile to my face so I took a cute selfie. I find the Japanese decor calming, simple, pretty, and classic. The employee brought smiles to my face with his sweetness and humor. And I’m thankful of my love for bringing me here and supporting me all the way…
img_20161226_172924_749.jpg

(Selfie via B612 APP)

I love this cute filter. I cut off half my face because I hate my smile but with this filter… whenever you smile the kittypops up on your head.

 

that little art in the back is my favorite. Often times I get mistaken for Japanese or Chinese when I’m actually Vietnamese. I don’t mind… but it gets tiring lol

&& NOw~ to introduce the seksy dinner~!!

THE SUSHI!!ย THE ROLLS! THE GLORYYYYYY~ YUM!!!!
It was YUMMMMYYYZZ~
img_20161226_1725_51.jpegIt was so fresh and nicely made

10/10 Dinner lol He gave us a bottle of spicy mayo, just in case..and to be honest I put it inside my sushi like a sandwich :p

I felt so at ease after. Food is a good incentive but what’s better is a change to a great environment and someone supportive.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To be honest, I get tired a lot with him. I am beyond grateful, I mean. But sometimes his support isn’t really there; for example, his comments be like the stereotypical dialogues of stigmas like “it’s mental/mindset, change it” or how he pushes when I mean it when I know I am not able to. It’s not that I won’t but I can’t. If it is “won’t” I still manage to push myself in the end. Because I want to change for the better as well. I want to train my mind and stop the fight or flight response as well.

Just few times like these… when I am exhausted and out of spoons… I wish they don’t get frustrated and understand.

~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been a crazy week with the weather change and everything. My brother has eczema so it’s possible that I got it too. But since the weather changed, my flare ups been crazy and my only patch and this tiny dry patch was on the back of my neck; just at the hairline… it has spread. And I seriously wanna cry. This ugly thing is like 3 inches and a half long and is growing. You can see that nastiness on my previous post but with advice of many and this sudden lump or lymph mode on my neck.. I am going to a walk in tomorrow ASAP! It’s just freaking me out so much. And to top it off, my eye lids been dry as heck as well.. scaly and I tried everything on that. I just don’t want to become more ugly than I am and more of a burden with all these conditions. I feel like this is my punishment from God and Santa… and the gift from Ol’ Krampus.

I’m dramatic… I know… but all this can’t be a coincidence, can it?

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Author: fromkatanawithlove

I'm a medical mystery, always was....so I'm documenting it๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… Honestly..it was really later in life when I discovered all my migraines and sudden weak immune system wasn't from poor eating. It was something I never expected... I was diagnosed with major depression and general and social anxiety. it was all messed up.. I hope those who visit my blog.. feel safe and connected too. I hope you know.. you're not alone. And to those you knows me... this blog is also for you to understand me better.

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